Thursday, June 5, 2014


I took this quiz the other day:
Without even finishing the dang thing, I knew what it was going to say: I give too many.

There's this pretty serious condition I have: insecurity.
 That, combined with being raised in the South by decent human beings, ensures that I care way too much about most things. 
I know that this is not particular to me. Except sometimes, in this Age of the Hipster, it seems like it is. Hipsters & hippies -- so, the young and old alike -- are all "live and let live" about the actually important things (marriage, abortion, gender, etc), but are such try-hards about stupid things. If you dare say one non-positive thing about Bob Dylan or Neutral Milk Hotel, you will find yourself surrounded by a semi-angry, bespectacled, banjo-wielding mob. 
Never underestimate the power of a banjo.
(Also, has anyone else made the Deliverance--banjo--hipster connection?)
I was taught manners + I'm ornery (aka I don't like to bandwagon) + I'm insecure about how others see me. 
Triple threat, baby. 
Often, this is a good thing: I write thank-you notes & make military-worthy plans. 
Sometimes, it results in slight inconveniences: I show up awkwardly early to things & can appear rude in social situations.
Always, it means obsessing over everything I say or do, with the extreme worry that I may offend someone or go above-and-beyond in terms of awk. 
However, I feel like I give exactly the right amount of effs & regarding exactly the right things. 
Just know that if I seem unfriendly or standoffish, it's because I'm doing my best to not be a huge freak in public. 
I'm at my best when discussing the truly important things: my extensive knowledge of Harry Potter, movies made in the 80's, and all music ever.
"References to geeky fandoms" generally falls under "A" for awkward
Just leave me be until I've had a drink or six & have properly loosened up for normal conversation.
Don't get me wrong; I will still be awk after many drinks. I just won't be aware of it. Win-win. 

IGAF. And I always will. 
Deals are a passionate breed & we feel strongly about many things.

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