Groundhoggin'

Groundhog. I can't even believe it was already two weeks ago. The weather was absolutely atrocious, but that just made it even more fun. We all got soaked + walked back in the mud + destroyed Old Mill even more than it already was. I say it every year, but this was my favorite Groundhog. This could be hindsight & rose-colored glasses & all of those other things, but the week-long recovery was worth it. [A week-long recovery might mean that I'm getting too old for this, but I refuse to acknowledge such implications.]

Dre's engagement party on Friday night.

The creepiest of photo booths & I love it.

Jake's face. That is all. 

Bests: snuggles & crushers.

The Circus turns into Beer Olympics every year.

Such a perfect depiction of GHog.

These two photosets are my proudest accomplishments, to date. I did this during class, and I was definitely getting some judgmental stares from the people around me. 

The Cuddle Cave. I've never felt so disgusting and comfortable at the same time.

Em & Jake being all thankful in Thanksgiving Square.

The face of someone who does NOT want to go home.

Aaaaaand Teresa came & of course we got no pictures, so business as usual. 

Now, with Lent in a few days, I get to reflect on the state of my life. I have been somewhat of a hot mess recently. I've gone out more than I should, meaning I've consumed more alcohol than I should, meaning I've done stupid things more than I should. So I'm in official detox. I've loaded up my phone with all sorts of Catholic apps, I'm doubling down on this whole law school thing, and adulthood will at least be feigned. Gird your loins, because I'm giving up alcohol + turning my diet into a clean eating keto. It's going to be ruff. 

I'm off to pray a decade of the rosary for every weird, drunk, embarrassing thing I've done recently. If I start now, I'll be done in a few months. 

Theven Things Thursday

I took a week off from el bloggo. Get over it. 

This is something I like to call "Theven Things Thursday" because:

- It's posted on Thursday, 

- It consists of theven seven things, 

- I like alliteration, and

- Lisps are sad and funny at the same time

     One of my Lenten disciplines is a weird & strict diet. 

It's not solely selfish; it really has been difficult & I have to be disciplined. 

So there. 

 I'm doing the Keto diet. 

It's kind of like Atkins, but I can't binge on meat, caveman-style. 

It's a little like Paleo, but doesn't restrict my love of all things dairy.
Also, sugar is the devil. 

Theven Things I Can Eat:

So…I eat a lot of meat and eggs. And cheese. 

Which may seem pretty awesome, 

but please don't be taken in by these savory seductresses. 

It gets old pretty dang fast. 

Also, I don't do things in a classy way, at all. 

I'm not having steak for dinner. 

I don't get home and prepare a gourmet cheese platter for one. 

(Although that sounds delicious & a little pathetic.)

Tonight, I ate this:

Lunch meat, cheddar cheese, & Brazil nuts. 

I'm like a giant elementary schooler. 

This is just a weird, sad version of a lunchable.

It also seems like it would do the opposite of help you lose weight. 

Not so, my friend. 

You can eat bacon & drop them pounds. 

Magic. 

However, a lady walked into the office with a box of Krispy Kreme and I almost punched her. 

I don't even like Krispy Kreme. 

But the thought of a carb being so close (and yet so far) made me punchy. 

The other thing about this Keto thing is that I can't drink beer. 

Double-edged sword, that one is. 

Beer is cheap, so I'm mad about that. 

But now I have to drink liquor. 

I don't have any other choice. (Not drinking is not an option.) 

So while you schmucks are day-drinking with common swill, 
I'll be going hard-ish with a whiskey & Diet Coke.

Fair warning: don't mention biscuits & gravy. I can't be held accountable for my actions.

Catholic Eye of the Tiger

One of the (minor) reasons I love being Catholic

is because we're such big one-uppers. 

No one can compete with us. 

Oh, you've got a famous guy as the head of your church?

BOOM.

You belong to a giant megachurch?

Oh, that's cute.

Your pastor devotes his life to God?

K, bye. 

Your religion appeals to a younger generation?

Cool.

A religion full of one-uppers. 

That's what makes Lent so difficult. 

I know it's not a contest, but it still kind of is. 

Plus, I have to one-up myself. 

Obviously, I also use Lent as a time for contemplation

& spiritual growth begotten from self-sacrifice.

But my brain is messed up & I see Lent as a challenge as well.

You don't know it, but I'm in competition--

with myself and also maybe you. 

My competitiveness is my cross to bear. Don't judge me.

I've got some ideas for Lent,

but I kind of wanted to see what y'all think would be the biggest sacrifice for me. 

(Also, I found out how to do a poll on Blogger & got excited.)

Choose wisely. 

What should be my Lenten discipline?
	Give up sarcasm
	Follow a restrictive fast
	Sacrifice social media
	Abandon unnecessary shopping
pollcode.com free polls

*I will probs definitely not choose based on these results. You don't own me.

This blog would be nothing without sarcasm. Could you go 40 days without it?

 Giving up social media would take away so much from you, but I would do it for Jesus. 

Shopping? I feel like I draw in a lot of converts just by dressing cute. 

But it's a sacrifice I would make. 

I'm pulling for the fast; self-discipline is a virtue that would

transfer to other areas of my life, 

plus it's high time I lose the baby weight I've been toting around for the past 22+ years.

Chubby cheeks just aren't coming back in style, no matter how hard I try to make it a thing. 

JKJK, guyz.